When All Else Fails: Unitard!

That’s my friend Briana in black and I am in brown- and together we are unitarded!

Unitard: noun- A tight-fitting one-piece garment of stretchable fabric that covers the body from the neck to the knees or feet.

My wardrobe knew I was pregnant before I did. The slow rejection of all things with waistbands was probably my first, albeit unknown-at-the-time pregnancy symptom. Before I even started gaining pounds my work pants became uncomfortable, I stopped considering my skinny jeans altogether, and even my yoga pants got on my nerves. Without ever wondering why my pants felt so wrong, I solved the problem simply by opening a drawer and digging out my barely-used unitard. Yes, I own a unitard. No, I am not a ballerina.

I bought my first unitard online a few years ago, possibly while drunk- because who buys a unitard?! I bought it thinking it was the perfect thing to lounge around the house in. It turns out that yoga pants are equally as comfortable and even easier to get into and out of, so the unitard became more of a novelty item which, thankfully, I had saved for its excellent halloween costume potential. When my pants problem began recently, I was able to dig it back out and truly appreciate it for the first time, in all of it’s waistband-less splendor. I essentially replaced all of my clothing with that one perfect, never-squeezy-in-the-middle garment. It’s not so much that I was anti-pants so much as I was pro-unitard!

I fell so in love with my unitard and wore it so often that I bought two more in different colors. I even have a favorite brand now, not that there’s a lot of selection out there- they are very hard to come by. I luxuriated in them around the house for weeks, thinking to myself: “I will wear nothing but unitards when I get pregnant,” and this, strangely, was well before I had any inkling that I was actually already pregnant. I had heard friends complain many times about the annoyance of shirts riding up over The Belly or pants falling below, so I knew immediately when I put it on that this was the thing they needed to solve all their wardrobe woes.

I thought it was such a great idea for mommies-to-be that I purchased one for my very pregnant friend Briana, who put it right on, to my great delight. Then she grew out of it roughly two seconds later when her humongous baby grew another three pounds, which I hear they do roughly every half  hour in the last few weeks of pregnancy. But for the short while she had it on she said she loved it so I was totally right about it being the perfect pregnant outfit- then I got to confirm it myself!

Why is the unitard is so perfect for a pregnant body? Because it’s not too tight anywhere, but it’s not saggy or loose anywhere either, so you don’t have to readjust it constantly. There is nothing stiff or rough or lumpy at the midsection, so The Belly is not irritated in any way, which is highly important. It is very versatile and can be worn to lounge in, to the gym, or even to dinner if you dress it up with a cute sweater and pearls. A unitard is like a big, soft tube sock that covers you from neck to toe, cozy as can be. A pregnant body is not a comfortable thing to walk around in, but thankfully a unitard is. So when you can’t be naked and you can’t stand pants, now you have an option. When all else fails: unitard!